We left at 7:00. eating sausage patties and banana muffins on the road, picking Kobid up at Zero Point.
It is certainly Monsoon Season which makes visiting natives a real event. especially with small children and all the mud everywhere. I always wonder if everybody will be able to stay upright this time.
Beauty’s mother’s name is Miriam and she lives with Beauty’s brother and his wife and 8 yr old dau. Genia. Their house is at the back corner of a 200 yr old cemetery. So actually a very nice location considering they have a huge concrete walled in “front yard” with all their neighbors being 6 ft under, giving it a peaceful, quieter atmosphere than most of Bangladesh city living. The story was told today of how years ago the family rented this house as it was low rent. Thru the years, the rent got less! And now they do not even have to pay rent anymore! Not a very common trend🤔
I had a surprise, I had not realized that Khokon and Beauty had a son! But he(Opu?) and their dau. Orpita met us out by the highway when we arrived. And showed us to the house. We stepped thru the doorway into the 1st small room, where Miriam’s body was lying on the bed. Her sister, which is our Sister Elizabeth from Kaligonj met us there where she took up residence on the bed next to Miriam. In the next room, Beauty and her children hung out with other visitors coming and going. And serving dim, ruti, and dhal for breakfast.
Beauty has been staying there with her mom and brother for this last month. Her and Elizabeth both seemed especially sad all day.. we were escorted thru another small room in the front of the house across from Miriam’s room where a laundry line was strung and floor beds were rolled up for the day. Into another bedroom with a bed, loveseat, and bathroom adjoining. Kokhon was hanging out in that room… I stayed there for a bit but soon found my way back over to where Beauty was, to sit with her and visit some and then spent some time in the front room with Elizabeth and Beauty’s brother and wife. At one point I stepped up to Elizabeth stepping on the burlap rug at the end of the bed. Squish. It was very soggy🤔 remember..everybody is bare foot, leaving their shoes outside the door…it was raining just outside the open doorway but only later did it fully dawn on me what I’d probably stepped in😳… I have not been acquainted with dead bodies that have not been embombed😝 but to these folks, it’s a natural part of life and death.. Later, I observed a couple women ringing the rug and rags out into buckets, no gloves, no ado….
Somehow None of Gentry’s pacifiers came along with us! So that presented it’s own challenge for the day😫
After awhile, Brian’s, Miss Aleigha, with Elizabeth’s husband, Boli and son arrived.
I walked out in the cemetery with Gentry to where the grave was still being dug. The cemetery was quite overgrown so couldn’t walk around too much beyond the path from the front gate to the house…we were warned of snakes..
Walked back to the house about the time they were bringing Miriam’s body out in the bed sheets to a covered area where they proceeded to wash and dress her. The daughter in law set to wailing… this lady died of cancer and was only a very small skeleton by this time. The casket⚰️ actually shaped just like this emoji! Was covered in black fabric, a couple narrow satin ribbons like green and white maybe 💭 all the way around with a few coordinating satin flowers here and there.
Sometime in here, Kaylee and I decided to go buy some flower bouquets. I’d taken note of the florist shops not far away, on the way in. Brian helped us hire one of the rickshaws waiting in line on the street side of the cemetery. We took Bennett and Annslie with us. The flower dokans were farther away than I had remembered, but not too bad. It didn’t take long to buy 2(one for Beauty and one for Elizabeth) already prepared, nice sized bouquets, for a total of 900 Taka(about 9 USD)
Back at the house, Miriam was already arranged in the casket there in the front yard. The flower bouquets were put in the casket with her for picture time. Perfume and scented powder was sprayed all around and over her…a prayer..and then the casket was carried to the cemetery.
On the way, the lid that was just loosely resting on top, was accidentally knocked askew🫣
The husband, that had been buried 14 years ago, was unearthed. A sheet covered his casket that was not holding together too good any more.😳
So the smallish crowd gathered around led by a robed priest? Supposedly not Catholic, but Church of Bangladesh, although the performances felt very Catholic🧐 1 or 2 Bangali songs were sung. A couple different times the crowd was lead in crossing themselves. The priest read from his book. Elizabeth and 2 other ladies were called on to speak… could hardly hear them… were they sharing memories?? The lid was moved aside, holy water was sprinkled, the bouquets were removed to be placed on the grave later. The lid was nailed down. And she was lowered by ropes and the husband next. We were given chunks of dirt and marigold petals throw over them.
As we had agreed to stay for lunch, we were escorted back to the house, back to the room with the loveseat, bed, and adjoining wash room. Instructed to rest 🤔 After awhile individual boxes of kichuri(rice and lentil mix) with a boiled egg were brought in with apologies for the wait time. It felt so backward… the family serving us. China plates and glasses again.. after lunch we invited the family in with us. Brian’s had brought a few Bangali hymnals. So we stood with the family and sang 5 or so songs. Boli and Elizabeth’s married son, I believe, took Gentry during this time and kept him happy till we were ready to leave. What a Godsend, as Tylenol was not kicking my headache and there was a tired Annslie around also.
Lonnie shared a scripture and some words then Brian’s turn. He had the same scripture in mind as Lonnie, but he shared words of comfort with the family also. Then Boli shared memories and we had a prayer.
Miss Christina went with Brian’s from there as they had invited her to come spend a little more time in Dhaka this summer with them and Miss Aleigha. And we took Kobid and Orpita back to Khulna with us. Lonnie and Kobid kept up a steady stream in the front seat. After a little small talk with Orpita. The whole crew of us fell asleep in the back of the van. I was feeling nauseous by this time with my headache🤕🤢 At Bissho Rd, Lonnie and Kobid helped Orpita catch the bus on to Gopalgonj.
Back at the house, Lonnie, Jaira, and Annslie went to Shunil’s to pick up Maddie’s birthday cake. I showered, then fixed the table up a bit.
After our little birthday party, Maddie commented, “That was a fun birthday!” Which made my momma heart glad! As native events can be a bit much for my girls sometimes. But it seemed like she handled the sudden change of plans and big day well✨
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